When I die, or you do, I’ll forgive you for your life—the whole thing—unconditionally, but if I continually forgive you for this small shit, you’ll just keep doing it. You’ve proved yourself no smarter than a puppy, so you’ll have to be trained like a puppy. Only nowadays we have Tasers. Is technology wonderful or what?
. . .
Italian, it turns out, is closer to Portuguese than to Spanish and of course French is just Spanish spoken with a severe speech impediment, but don’t tell the French that or they won’t make you any Freedom Fries to go with your Royale.