|You can be good if you force yourself!
||[Aug. 16th, 2016|03:03 am]
Phrembah (a potato-like mystery)
You know that you can . . .
Never having gone on a mission, I have yet to return from one, but I laughed out loud at your description of your friend's personal improvement program with the calendar and checklist and "scripture snake." That's me, that's me! I was ten or younger when I wrote out my first personal improvement program (I know because it was before we moved). I wrote it Monday or Tuesday and it did not survive the weekend. I've been doing it ever since.
I love setting it up, but I never follow it any longer than a New Year's resolution. Everyone loves to say, "It's not the destination, but the journey . . ." With me it's not the destination or the journey; it's the preparation for the journey. And, having perfectly prepared myself for a journey, I abandon that one and begin preparing for another---because that's what I really like to do: plan and prepare. One thing I've done a lot is use a particular day as a stake in the ground to measure the journey from: Milepost Zero. Of course New Year's Day is the most obvious, but if that comes and goes without any real progress, I change it to Ground Hog Day or the ides of March maybe or April 1st or April 15th or May Day or Cinco de Mayo or the Fourth of July or my birthday or (being from Utah) Pioneer Day or whatever.
I can take something on and finish it. At one point I began to feel less than whole because I'd never received a bachelor's degree, so I quit work and knocked one out in about two and a half years. I can pull a pretty big wagon up a pretty steep hill, but I can't drive for shit. I need a college or an employer for that---sounds like so do a lot of other folks. But I still love the illusion of self-directedness. I can sit here and watch myself be deluded about being a self-directed free thinker and still love it.